Misadventures in the Cosmetics Industry
I will start from, where else but, the beginning. When my dad moved out, my mom came up with several ideas for sources of income. She has practically always owned her own daycare, but now needed supplement income to maintain the household. Enter in-home businesses. Child care provider by day, candle and cosmetics extraordinaire by night! I vaguely remember any of this as I moved out and was preoccupied with my own turmoil anyway. However, the mysterious circle of life seems to well, circle back around, doesn't it?Fast forward like twelve years. I am minding my own business when my neighbor (hey, shed make some good blog posts herself) invited me to an XXXXX demonstration. I obliged because Im cool like that. Also, I knew that XXXXX was in the business of all natural skin care. Its important to me to take care of my skin anyway, and I had been breaking out a lot due to crazy hormones post popping the kids out. So, I go.
I was impressed with the demonstration, and instead of just being the good neighbor by buying something (I had only intended on a concealer to, you know, conceal the breakouts), I became the awesome neighbor by buying the whole skin care kit. I like the fact that XXXXX uses aloe vera as the base of all their products. Plus, I had tried everything else out there, so why not?
I booked my own demonstration (thus becoming SUPER neighbor) because I would get FREE stuff for doing so. Long story short, I had my demonstration, the consultant sold a ton of stuff at it and pumped up my ego by telling me I was _________(replace with 1000 different compliments).
She said I should come to a franchise meeting because I was so __________ and would be PERFECT at this. She saw something *special* in me. Wow. Me? Awww! This left me with a lot of deliberating to do. I was in dire need of getting out of the whole Im now just only someone's wife and only someone's mommy mentality I was stuck in. It was no obligation to just go and listen. Right?
Well, I left that meeting with a training kit. They sucked me right in. First, and foremost, I have never had a group, clique, circle of amigas I had ever been a part of. Women are usually just heinous, and I've always steered clear of them. These girls at this meeting all walked up to me, hugged me and found something about me to compliment. There was no vile gut reaction on my part! No these girls are so fake, shoot me thoughts crossed my mind. Spooky. Secondly, I need some money. I found out the commission rocks. Thirdly, I have this certain issue with going out and interviewing, so if someone was going to walk up to me and hand me a job, uh, I better snatch it up. Again, why not?
So, the issue. I have social anxiety/panic disorder/agoraphobia/whatever. I've been on and off meds for 10 years now. I just recently started seeing someone again about It (and it was high time too). But, anyway. I was rather freaked out with the notion that I (that would be ME) was really going to stand up in front of people and give demonstrations. This is a test. This is only a test. The Emergency Pessimistic System does not think I can do it. Well, screw the system! I WILL do it!
In getting back out into the real world, I picked the most strenuous possible job for myself. It has been sheer stubbornness (and a little chemical imbalance regulator here and thereI wont lie) that has gotten me through. I have been pumped about this whole consultant job though. I've actually enjoyed trainings and meetings and conferences (Yay! Houston!) with all the girls. I've tapped into an inner part of me I never knew existed through this experience. That's pretty cool.
And guess what? I proved myself. In March, I was a super close 3rd in sales out of the entire franchise. Sweet, yeah?
Since then, it seems I have run out of steam. I had not given up the last month or so as I was working really hard behind the scenes coming up with sales. But, I cant seem to get the bookings up no matter what I try to do. I don't want it to look like Im a quitter. I am, however, on the last millimeter of the closest edge of the decision to move away from doing the presentations now.
I am sad because I actually cant stand the thought of not seeing any of the girls again. If I move away from the presentations, I also move away from the trainings and meetings and conferences. I do actually hate the presentations themselves now. I hate how sick I am the day before the day of the presentation, the day of the presentation and the day after the presentation. It takes such an extraordinary toll on me to do them. I know a lot of people just wouldn't understand. I was supposed to enjoy this adventure, but Im sick over it instead.
I wont think myself a quitter. Ill think myself someone who came into a job with a goal, and the goal was simply to prove that I could even do it in the first place.
I am proud of myself after all.
